The Emotional Intelligence Framework Behind Every Creative Block: The Four Inner Voices

Hello, Lighten Up Nation! It is I, Malcolm Grissom, the stand-up CEO and founder of the World Laughter Organization, and welcome to this episode of the Lighten Up Project. This is actually the first episode Of a two episodes series where we will be will talking a little bit about emotional intelligence, specifically the four voices in our heads and how to what happens when we just avoid them, or how laughter can help us deal with them. I guess because we can't really overcome them. See, I believe now there are very few absolutes in life, there really aren't taxes, death. These are some absolutes, right? And the same way that addicts or AA alcoholics anonymous the 12 steps, in the same way that they believe once an addict, always an addict. I believe these four voices will always remain in our heads, right? Not active. They don't have to be active. We don't have to listen to them. You know, we can learn to quiet them, to subdue them, but I think they're always going to be there under the surface. So let's talk about these four voices, and I'm going to use terms that are original, But I'm also going to talk about things that a lot of us have heard about, like the inner critic. A lot of us have heard the the inner critic, and there's three voices. So most frameworks have three voices: the creator, the judge, and the inner critic, right? Or however you name them, however you want to name them, the inner critic I think is should be broken down into two different Separate voices, because there's part of the inner critic that should be listened to more than the other part. The other part is the what I call the saboteur. So the voices are the originator, The evaluator, the challenger, and the saboteur. So the originator is the one that comes up with the great ideas. You know, the the evaluator is more of what we think of the credit, the inner credit. So the evaluator has one function in my role. The way I think of it, the evaluator's function is

really to look at the ideas and to to look at them critically, to evaluate them: Should this be done? Should you really do this? Is this really a good idea? Right. Think of the child putting their hands on the oven, you know, hot oven. No, we shouldn't do that. The evaluator is going to tell us, no, don't do that. That's hot. Don't touch. That's the evaluator. The next is the challenger. The challenger is the one that really looks at the material and really challenges it. Like this has been done, but how can we do it better? Take this idea, so the challenger does not evaluate the idea. The challenger is always, how can we make this better? Always asking that question. Let's do this better. Let's do this differently, man. All right. So that's the challenger. Those three voices are ones I believe that we should listen to. The most, but then there's this saboteur. The saboteur is the one that's judging, not the work. It's judging us, right? So the saboteur and the evaluator both are what a lot of frameworks think of as the inner critic, but I'm breaking them down because we need to listen to the evaluator sometimes. Do we really need to listen to the saboteur? I think so. I think actually, even though the saboteur is judging us and not judging the work, the only reason we need to listen to the saboteur and recognize the saboteur is because we can use that as ammunition, right? The saboteur is the one that's gonna say, "You're always bombing. You're stupid. You come up with the worst ideas. And after, and when we listen to that, when we recognize that, oh, that's the saboteur talking. When we recognize that and listen to that, that can, for some of us, be useful as ammunition. So we'll say, oh, really? Well, I was bombing, huh? Well, hey, let's see about this. How you like me now? You know. So let's take those four voices and let me actually give you an example. So. picture this: you're sitting down to build a presentation, and you're facing this blank

document. Oh, oh! I've got it! I've got it! That's the originator. Hasn't even written a word, it's already mentally accepting that Oscar.

I got it, but before the originator can finish celebrating, ah, yeah, cool story, man. It's also the one that's been told. Everyone's told that story since PowerPoint was invented. That's the evaluator, but you haven't even processed what the evaluator's saying, and then it's well. Actually, if we're going to keep that opening, that that slide six needs to go where slide two is. And can we talk about your font because this Comic Sans is just-it's a cry for help, man. That's the challenger. Always rearranging furniture in the house before the house is even built yet. Now, underneath it all, you're gonna bomb. You're gonna bomb. You always do. You always come up with these stupid ideas, and you bomb. You might as well just cancel the meeting now and just tell everyone you got sick. The seven. Now there's these four voices that are constantly going on in our heads. Daniel Goldman, who has come up with one of my favorite quotes about emotional intelligence, and he said. "There is perhaps no psychological skill more fundamental than resisting the impulse. So think of the saboteur, especially as impulse. So now let's try that again. That conversation again, starting with the originator, still. Over focused and excited, but now a little more focused. Ooh, I've got this great idea. Okay, we're gonna open with a story that surprises them. The evaluator speaking in an actual sense now. Well, that's fine, yes, but that's been done. What's your version of it now? Instead of spiraling, the evaluator comes back with, "Okay, well, that's a good note. Here's what I'm thinking, and of course, now the challenger gets a turn. Great, great, great. Okay, now, given this sharper story, here's how I think we should restructure the slides, and I still want to talk about that font and the saboteur. Still sighing, but everyone's ignoring him because hey, he's a saboteur. What he thinks right now doesn't matter, and that, my friends, is ignoring impulse. See, we don't have to

defeat the saboteur. We just stop calling on it. We stop recognizing it. We stop giving its voice meaning. So now let's take this a step further into actual leading. So I want you to picture those four voices. Same four voices: the originator, the evaluator, the challenger, and the saboteur, but now this time, instead of coming up with a slide deck, you're actually running a team, and everyone's watching you right now, they're live. You're in real time. Everyone's waiting to see what you're going to do and how you're going to lead them and lead this meeting. So now, what are those four voices in your head saying? All right, my friends. So now that I have told you and explained the four voices, I want to stop there and let you think about the four voices in your head, and then in our next episode, we'll talk more about how they come into play when you're leading, and how laughter, and humor, and play can help save the day. Until next time, thanks so much for tuning in. And as always, it is we could not do this without your help. So please share the Lighten Up Project with others. Tell people about us. Twice a week, we're doing this. Until the next time we speak, remember, every smile may open the door. Every laugh may open a heart, and every step may be your next victory.