Building Your GPO Community: The Connection Map

[00:00:05] You're listening to Empowered to Lead, the therapist's practice. I'm Lisa Catallo, therapist, business coach, and your go-to for all things leadership and sustainable practice growth. This is your space for real talk, smart strategies, and grounded support to help you lead with confidence, work with intention, and build a business that actually works for you. Let's dive in.

[00:00:29] Welcome back to the Empowered to Lead. I'm so glad that you are here today. In today's episode, we're going to be following up on last week's episode and talking about how to build your GPO, your group practice community by using a connection map.

[00:00:49] And so last week, I asked you to do something hard. I asked you to look at the cost of leaving alone and to start naming where it was showing up in your life as a group practice owner. If you did that work, if you missed that episode, go back and listen to that one first because we're going to be referring to it in today's episode. But if you did that work, you probably noticed something.

[00:01:16] The advice that I gave you, almost all of it came back to one phrase, a peer or a coach. Talk to a peer or a coach. Text a peer or a coach. Ask a peer or a coach. And maybe like a peer or a coach.

[00:01:32] And maybe like a lot of owners, you got to the end of that episode and thought, well, that sounds awesome, Lisa, but who? I don't have those people in my life. Who do I actually text at 947 on a Tuesday night? Who am I supposed to ask the imposter question to? Who tells me when my normal has drifted? And so that's the question that we're answering today.

[00:01:59] And so today we're going to start building what I call a connection map. Before we get into the tool, I want to name something. When business owners, whether you're a group practice owner, small business owner, whatever term you want to use for yourself, when they realize that they're leading alone, the default move is to try and add more people. So more networking. I need to make more LinkedIn connections.

[00:02:29] I need to create more coffee dates. Maybe I start more memberships. And it almost never solves the problem because the problem isn't the number of people. The problem is the kind of people. And then you add in, yeah, but I'm an introvert and I don't really want to open up to people. It's really hard to meet new people. Maybe I'll just keep doing it alone. And I want to challenge you.

[00:02:55] I would say most of us, when we actually look at our circle, honestly, most of us have one or two rules really well filled. So maybe you have a great coach, but no one really to celebrate the small wins with. Maybe you have a really beautiful group of friends, but no one who's like two steps ahead of you in business and group practice ownership.

[00:03:21] Maybe you have a brilliant accountant, but no one who knew you before you became the owner. And so that circle isn't actually measured by how many people are in it. We want to measure it by the roles that are covered. So today I'm going to walk you through six roles that every group practice owner needs in their circle. We're going to name what each of them does.

[00:03:46] And then I'm going to give you three questions to ask about each one of those. And by the end, you're going to have a map of where you are full, where you're thin, and where you have a gap that you didn't quite know was there. This is the connection map. So grab something to write if you can. Write on if you can. If you're driving or walking, just listen and then come back to this.

[00:04:16] Grab your journal. There's also going to be a worksheet version of this in the show notes if you want to fill it in properly later. Here are the six roles. Got your pen and paper? So role one is the sounding board. So this is the person you think out loud with. This person doesn't need to solve it.

[00:04:39] They are there to hold the question with you while you figure out what you actually think. So sounding board, like bouncing it off of them. So last week, I called this your two-minute peer or coach. So hey, I'm leaning toward X. Am I missing something? That's the sounding board. For most owners, this role is filled by a peer or a coach. Sometimes both.

[00:05:09] The sounding board is actually the most used role in a healthy circle. And it's often the first one to go thin when you get busy because the relationship requires reciprocity and time. And when you're feeling thin, when you're feeling really busy, time is a really important commodity that you start to protect and isolate.

[00:05:37] Role two is the person who is two steps ahead. So this is the person whose practice is at the stage you're heading toward. Not so far ahead that their problems aren't the same as yours, but not so close that they're solving the same things together. Two steps. Far enough that they've already crossed the wall that you're climbing.

[00:06:01] And close enough that they still remember what it feels like to be doing that climbing. The two steps ahead role does something that the sounding board can't. So they show you what's on the other side. They tell you how they got there. They normalize what you're facing because they've already faced it.

[00:06:23] And then those owners without a two steps ahead person tend to overestimate how unusual their problems are. So if you don't have someone who's a little bit further ahead of you, you're going to start thinking, I'm unique. I'm the only one that has this problem. Why? Why do I keep hitting up against this?

[00:06:47] And if you talk to somebody who's two steps ahead, you get to see where you aren't the only one and normalize some of that for you. Rule three is the mirror. So this is the most honest person in this circle. This is the one who tells you when you're off. They're not necessarily a cheerleader and they're not a critic. They're a mirror.

[00:07:13] So this is the person who says, I'm not sure that's the real reason. Or you've talked about this hire three times now and you keep stopping yourself. The person who reflects back what you can't see yourself is the mirror. So most often this role is actually a coach or a longtime peer or mentor who has earned that level of honesty over the years.

[00:07:43] The mirror is the role that protects you from your own blind spots. It's also the role most owners are most resistant to because that mirror's job is to be uncomfortable. If you don't have a mirror, you're flying blind and you don't know it. That's the definition of the role. This for me is Alison Maritas. She will be a mirror for me.

[00:08:10] You should be like, hey, you've been talking about this or think maybe you're overreacting. How's that feeling? And the mirror is so important in your role as a group practice owner. The fourth role, role four is the cheerleader. So we just said the mirror is not a cheerleader. So this is a different person. This is the person who genuinely celebrates your wins without making it about them.

[00:08:39] And I want to actually push back on the instinct to dismiss this role. So a lot of you are going to say, I don't need a cheerleader. I need real feedback. And yes, you do. And you also need someone who's going to clap when you sign the lease. When you make payroll for the first time without checking the account three times to make sure that you can.

[00:09:02] When you finally let go of the clinician who was draining the team, you want someone who sees that, who celebrates that, who's got those pom-poms out cheering you on. And owners systematically under-celebrate. I know I have to purposefully celebrate things and people. So as soon as we accomplish something, we move the goalposts.

[00:09:30] We hit a milestone and we immediately list what is still missing. Where do I have to still go? And so that cheerleader is the person who says, hey, let's slow down a second. Let's celebrate that. Let's, that took you a while to get to that milestone and they refuse to let it go uncelebrated. Even if it's just a quick, you know, what is that? If you send a text in the iPhone, you can send confetti with it.

[00:09:59] Just that little bit of celebration. So this role is often a friend or a family member who gets it enough to celebrate properly. They've watched and they're like, hey, that's awesome. Sometimes it's a peer. It's sometimes a coach, but often coaches are paid to keep you moving forward. I would say that can be something like, I think it's important that your coach celebrates some of these things.

[00:10:29] And okay, so that's awesome. You did really well. Now, how does that inform how you want to move forward? Rule five is the expert. So this is the person you call for a specific kind of answer. It could be your accountant, your bookkeeper, your lawyer, your HR consultant, your tech person, maybe your insurance broker, and that expert doesn't know your whole picture.

[00:10:54] So even notice those different roles that I told you, accountant, bookkeeper, lawyer, that's not going to be somebody who can do all the things. So having more than one expert in your corner is important. So they don't know the whole picture. They know their piece very deeply. And they're the ones that you call when that piece is the question. Most of us have at least one or two of those experts in our lives.

[00:11:25] How are you using them? So the gap that I usually see is that we underuse those experts that we've got, or you're using the wrong expert because you haven't upgraded as your practice has grown. Realizing that lawyers have specialties. And so there's going to be one lawyer for contracts. There's going to be another lawyer for employment. There's going to be another one who helps you figure out leases,

[00:11:54] knowing who's the right expert and if that has changed as you've grown. So here's a quick test. If you have an accountant who's great for solar practitioners, and you now have eight clinicians on your team, your expert role for finance is filled, but it may be filled at the wrong level. That's a gap that's dressed up as a relationship or the lawyer piece as well. So role six is the witness.

[00:12:24] So this is one that most of us forget exists. So the witness is someone who knew you before you became a practice owner, before you started creating this amazing thing. They remember you before you became the owner. Maybe it's a friend from your master's program. Maybe it's a sibling who watched you start. The mentor from your first job who's known you for 15 years now.

[00:12:53] And that witness role doesn't get used often. But when it does, nothing else can replace it. That witness is the antidote to your identity drift. She or he is the person who says, I remember you before all of this. And I see you now and you are still you. If your whole circle is people who only know you as the owner,

[00:13:21] you're at risk of forgetting that the owner is something you do. It's not something you are. Keeping that perspective of this is a business that's supposed to serve me. It doesn't need to become my identity. And that witness role keeps that line clear. So here's three questions for you. Now that you have the six roles,

[00:13:45] I'm going to ask you to go back to each of those roles and ask these three questions. So number one, who fills this role for me right now? So go to each of them. Name the person who already fills that role. If there's more than one person that fills it, name all of them. And if no one does, don't write anything in. Don't even go like Jane question mark. Only write that name down if they actually fill that role.

[00:14:16] Second question is, how recently have I actually used this person in this role? So was it last week, last month? Has it been longer than that? And be really honest at this point. A relationship that exists on paper but hasn't been used in the last six months isn't actually currently filling the role. Cross them out. The third question is, if this role disappeared tomorrow, what would I miss?

[00:14:44] And some of those are going to be blank. And so you might notice what you miss by not having that kind of person in there. This question forces you to see what the role actually does for you. And it tells you which roles you would feel the loss of fastest. And do this for all six roles. And then you start to have a map. When you look at your whole map, you're going to see four kinds of patterns. You're going to see filled and active. There's a name.

[00:15:14] There's a recent date. There's a clear sense of what you would miss. And this is a healthy role. Leave it alone. Protect it. Make sure that you remember that that is something that you are doing well and you have connection there. Maybe you see something that's filled but it's unused. So there's a name there. But the last time you used this person in that role was months ago. So this is a relationship that means tending, not necessarily replacing.

[00:15:43] That person's there. You just haven't been picking up the phone. Maybe there's a thin pattern in here. So only one person fills the role and that relationship is fragile. One coach you might leave. One peer who lives in another country. Or a friend who's going through her own hard season. It isn't actually currently available.

[00:16:10] So thin roles are the ones that look filled. But they aren't. So these are the most vulnerable spots on your map because you think there's somebody there. And then there's disappointment or frustration because that role actually isn't being filled. Empty. So no one fills this role. Sometimes this is recent. Sometimes it's been empty for years.

[00:16:35] And maybe you didn't even acknowledge or realize that you needed that kind of person in your life. So the empties are usually the one that you've stopped expecting to be filled, which is probably why they stay empty. So check that. Is this something that I had before? Or something that I've wanted? And maybe I think I'm not worth it. Or I'm frustrated because I've been disappointed.

[00:17:02] Or I never even realized that this was something that I needed. So the empties and the thins are your action items. Not all at once. Don't try and accomplish it all in the next two weeks. Pick one of them. And then what do you want to do with them with the information that you have gathered? So there's a few honest things that I want to talk about about filling those gaps.

[00:17:28] You can't manufacture a relationship in any of these rules overnight. They are important rules for you. Especially the mirror, the two steps ahead in the witness. Those are rules that take time, takes trust, and takes intentionality to grow into. You can, however, start. You can identify the person who could be a two steps ahead person and reach out for coffee or a Zoom call.

[00:17:57] You can ask the long-term peer who's been honest with you for years if she would be willing to be more direct more often. You can reconnect with that witness that you haven't called in the last three years. And you'll probably find that they've been waiting. And for the sounding board and the cheerleader, the gaps are often easier to fill than they feel. The right people are often already in your life just underused.

[00:18:27] And for the expert, that gap is usually about upgrading, not about finding someone from scratch. For the mirror, this is where coaching does some of its most important work. And it's one of the most common reasons that group practice owners hire a coach in the first place. Hey, I'm feeling stuck here. Am I looking at it properly? Or what am I missing kind of thing? Pick one rule today. Just one.

[00:18:56] The thinnest or the emptiest. And figure out one action that you can take toward filling it this week. Don't take all six. Just pick one. When you do this work, honestly, you usually find one of two things. You find that you have more circle than you thought. And you've just been underusing them. And that is a gift. And that's the easier version of this work. Because the people are already there. You just have to foster those relationships.

[00:19:26] Or you can find the gaps that are real. And they're bigger than a coffee date can fix. That's the kind of community you actually need to take time to build. And you've been trying to build it in 15-minute increments between clinic hours and paperwork and the grocery store. And it's just not working. So if this is something that you've found, I want to name something that I named last week.

[00:19:52] Some kinds of medicine only work at a certain dose. You can build a connection map in 20 minutes at your kitchen table. You can fill in the gaps over months and years. And both are real. And both are work. But if you're sitting with a map that has more empties than fills. And you're tired of trying to build it alone in the cracks of your week.

[00:20:18] This is exactly why I run retreats every year at Group Practice Network. A retreat is, among other things, a room full of potential sounding boards, two steps ahead, and mirrors. All in one place for several days. With the time and space set aside to actually become those things in others' lives. It might just be for that couple of days.

[00:20:44] But what I've seen in every retreat that I have run so far is that long-term relationships have built. And that has actually been the biggest takeaway from retreats. Finding people to fill this connection map. And in a space where you're not distracted. And this is actually one of the purposes of connecting.

[00:21:09] So you can find what we have coming up at grouppracticenetwork.ca backslash retreats. And one more thing before you go. Over the summer on this podcast, I'm going to be sharing stories from real group practice owners who have been leading alone. They've been building community. They've been finding peers. They've been naming the costs. And we're going to talk about what's actually helped them.

[00:21:36] So if today's episode named the rules for you, the summer is going to put faces and voices to them. And to hear how other people filled those roles and made it through some of these places where you are. So you can hear in someone else's words, I've been there. I'm still there. You aren't the only one. You don't have to keep leading alone. You have a map now.

[00:22:02] So if anything resonated in here, I'd love to hear from you. You can send me an email. I read and respond to all of them. Take a look at the retreats. See if that might be something that would fill your bucket and help you fill that connection map. And I hope you have a great day. And thanks for tuning in. Thanks for hanging out with me on Empowered to Lead, the therapist's practice. I hope you're walking away with something that you can put into action.

[00:22:32] Because leadership isn't about doing more. It's about leading with purpose. If you're ready for deeper support, I'd love to see you inside the Group Practice Connection, my monthly membership where Canadian therapists like you get coaching, community, and the tools to build a business that actually supports your life. You can check it out at grouppractisenetwork.ca. The link's in the show notes. And hey, don't forget to hit follow so you don't miss what's coming next.

[00:22:58] We're building something great here, and I'm so glad you're a part of it.